Who knew that while citizens everywhere were lambasting their national security agencies for anal retentive airport security regulations that outlawed hair gels, toothpaste and other toiletry products in carry on luggage, it was actually a clever counter-terrorism tactic designed to dupe uneducated terrorist wannabes into trading in their C-4 for K-Y jelly. The first evidence that the ploy is working comes when a mad bomber tosses a bag of toiletries over the fence at the Canadian Prime Minister’s residence.
Tag Archive: Awards
Jan 01
Movie of the Year 2007
“300”
Runner Up: “(Live Free or) Die Hard IV
Honourable Mention: Casino Royale (James Bond); The Transformers
Best Movie filmed by a camera crew comprised solely of persons with “Attention Deficit Disorder” using only cell phones (or so it seemed): The Bourne Ultimatum.
Jan 01
Book of the Year 2007
“What is the What” by David Eggars.
This epic story of Valentino Achak Deng, one of the Lost Boys of Sudan, puts the origins and the tragedy of Darfur into a very readable perspective. It is a must read for everyone and should probably be front and centre on every school board’s required reading lists for grade eight’s in order to put their own lives, prejudice and/or perceived realities of the world they live in into context.
Honourable Mention: “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows” by J.K. Rowling smashed US sales records when it sold 8.3 million copies in the first 24 hours after its release. It represented a fun and nicely knotted, albeit, at times long-winded and thick, end to the series (however, it will probably play better on the big screen).
Jan 01
Song of the Year 2007
“U + Ur Hand” by P!nk
Honorable Mention:
“Don’t Blink” by Kenny Chesney
“All I Ever Wanted” by Brian Melo
“Apologize” by OneRepublic
Jan 01
Commercial Blooper of the Year 2007
The Province of Ontario released a publication explaining their poorly articulated referendum for a new mixed member proportional electoral system with only one clearly understandable statement as follows: “Referendums do not happen often. When they do it is because the opinion of the public, you the voter, is important.” If I understand those two sentences correctly regardless of the system used or the party elected the opinion of you the voter is not often important.
Jan 01
Statistic of the Year 2007
In August, Scientific Institutes in the U.S. and Japan confirmed that the Arctic Ice coverage has shrunk to its smallest size ever recorded even as there was still at least another month of melting left to go this summer. One expert predicted that the world could witness a complete summer melt within 25 years (2032).
Jan 01
Revelation of the Year 2007
I stumbled over an old book about the Chinese Opium Wars (1839 to 1842 and 1856 to 1860 respectively). But for 150 years and few small changes to the hot commodities and issues of the day, the story and events parallel and/or explain much of the world as we know it today. In short, Britain was experiencing a debilitating trade deficit with “China.” The British were addicted to “tea” imported from China, but although Britain was hot off it’s industrial revolution and mass producing everything under the sun for trade with the rest of the world, China was not interested in anything the British had to trade. Then the Brits “liberated” the Indian Subcontinent and their poppy fields and soon discovered that the Chinese had a sweet tooth for opium. Before the Chinese knew it, they had a very big problem that was growing as fast as the trade deficit was turning in favor of the Brits. Although the opium trade was considered illegal both in Britain and in the World Courts, attempts by the Chinese to shut it down led to a declaration of war by the Brits based on exaggerated pretenses. The 2nd Opium War was declared over the same issues but on even shakier pretenses (i.e. bald faced lies). The French and to a lesser extent the Americans joined the Brits in this enterprise that proved to be much more difficult than they had originally planned.
Related revelation: As we gathered up around our tree on Christmas morning I took stock of the origins of our newfound material wealth. The only item that was not made in China was a pair of Bone “China” mugs that were made in …Britain. Go figure – the world has come full circle and China is back on top (while the rest of us are left wondering what to do with our liberated poppy field problem).
Jan 01
My “Let’s Run This Government Like a Business” award goes to… past and present Canadian politicians (they know who they are).
2007 is rife with stories of Canadian politicos caught and/or brought up on charges of the shady small “c” corruption kind.
Jan 01
My “PT Barnum (There’s a sucker born every day)” award goes to… Provincial Lottery operators.
Shortly after an Ontario Ombudsman report found that the suspiciously frequent number of winning tickets claimed by lottery retailers and other insiders was a clear case of fraud as opposed to good fortune, other Provinces announce they are initiating similar investigations
Jan 01
My “Talking Heads Say the Darnedest Things” (or Gossip Trumps Analysis on the Nightly News) award goes to… the CTV News Anchors.
They continue to trumpet the strength of the rising Canadian Loonie as being the product of our burgeoning Canadian commodities and economy – with nary a word to the effect that it might be in a large part the result of the tanking US dollar and economy.
In related stories: In February of this year, a US congressional committee blows the latest whistle on the Bush Administration’s frugal money management skills during their investigation of the biggest transfer of cash in the history of the Federal Reserve. Approximately 363 tons of shrink-wrapped $100 bills (or, for those of us who consider money to be something more than fodder or freight, $12 billion) were flown into Iraq in 2004 for disbursement to Iraqi ministries and US contractors. An obscure consulting firm called North Star Consultants Inc. was hired to oversee the expenditures. The firm was so small that it reportedly operates out of a private home in San Diego. Later in the year, and a little closer to home, the bottom falls out of the American sub-prime mortgage market. Losses to date are estimated at $148billion and counting.